And here I am falling, with this book in my hand.

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 A list of shit I’ve currently stopped or have realized I no longer desire to give anymore energy to thus resulting in the deep rabbit hole i find myself inevitably falling down. 

• Overextending myself
• Forging fake connections 
• Shrinking to make others feel better
• Lying to keep the peace 
• Expecting me out of others 
• Tip toeing around others feelings 
• Being the ”Yes Bxtch” 
• Continuing awkward conversations after being ignored
• Consistency for others who weren’t consistent for me
• Caring if I mattered to those who really didn’t matter to me! 
• Acting like I was OKAY when inside I was DROWNING IN MY OWN TEARS 
• Have a pity party for myself
• Being the star in someone else’s reality without starring in my fucking own (That’s fucking wild as hell!)
• Acting clueless when I’ve got 50 blues clues 🐾 🐾 🐾 bow wowwwww! 🐶
• Minding anyone else’s business but my own: No drama 🎭 No problems 
• Doom scrolling on social media
• living on modern day “terms” 🤍
• Accepting opinions of people who have got the life experience of a freshly soft pillowed blanket but act like they wear burlap sacks and go to war. Please! 🙄
• Allowing mediocrity in my presence when I am LITERALLY pressure 💎 
• Applying pressure to those who I needed to let go. 
• Thinking that I need closure. (I don’t. Fuck you and Good day!)
• Over sharing parts of myself to those who are unavailable: That’s even simple conversation—surface level type shit. (This probably goes right along with over-extending which can also look like going out of your way to help someone who can’t be bothered to even pick up the phone and give you a fucking call!) 📞 

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Does anybody know when the hole ends?! Or does it just keep going and going???!

I think I’ve seen myself several times now through the glass reflections falling from a shattered mirror!🪞

Sincerely, 

Alice’s concerned sibling. 〰️